Status : Broke & Desperate

I'm broke.
Some people meant it metaphorically. Or just as a figure of speech or a joke. Charm? Literally.

Haih... Let me explain to you... I have allowance of only £500 ( RM 3,500 ) per month, including rent, bills, phone usage, food, necessities etc.

But then you might think, I thought u had scholarship wert... Senang la... It's not that simple ler... I applied for the one that sponsors only the course tuition fees, but not my expenses etc. If I wanted sponsorship for everything then I would be bonded by the company. My parents decided they could support on my monthly expenses part, therefore I picked the one without bonding. I would have to pay 1st and then they reimburse us. Getting free education is not easy I tell you.

But thing is, honestly, my family is just an average-income family. My parents cant afford to put one big lump sum of money into my bank account over here to survive through the year, like some other overseas student. My mom would send me money every month to sustain me through until I run out of cash again. And everytime I do, do you know how hard it is to ask from my parents money, knowing they're so tight on liquidity? I felt like such a big burden on my family. I had quit on my job and finding a new one less than 2 months before my finals is kinda like suicide. Besides, no one's gonna hire me if I start and quit before the exams...

Earlier, our family had thought that we could pull through it all coz my dad's 1 year plus of project work would finally be paid off. But now the stingy-wicked-mean-ol' client of my dad refuse to pay up my dad's commission. A year's pay gone just like that. Like WTF?? This client is such a rich company director and a prominent shareholder in some big Malaysian companies but cant honour his side of the payment? My fren and I had googled bout this fella and guess what, he's on the Sultan of Kedah's birthday list of honours. HONOUR MY FOOT. He's the least person on the list to deserve the honours. Exploiting sole businessman like my dad.

I SO WANNA SCREAM OUT LOUD.... AAAAHHHHHHHHH

My bank account is less than £50 as of today. Probably could survive for another week or so. This means I have to ask for money again... It really is a burdening request everytime... I just talked to my family on skype. My mom was really in a bad mood coz she cant find £510 in time for me to pay for my QBD Fees. I don't mind not having money for expenses.. I can surely dig up something. I just need to pay for this QBD.

Feel so pek cek & frust being so far away and cant help out. If I'm back home in Pg, I'll go up to that bloke's office and demand him to pay up. Probably flex my muscle. N show my mean face. Think I'm scared ah ? Come la !

Haih... that's such an impulsive childish thinking. If it's really that simple my dad would've gotten the money earlier la. Law suit settlement would antagonise the situation. How can I fight against such a powerful fella? I cant even get pass his bodyguards la.... I admit I had cried a lot thinking about the whole thing. Luckily I had darvin n wei xin to comfort me. Thx guys.... I was trying to brain storm how I'm gonna pay for my QBD. Well, God had promised that he'll provide. So I put my full trust in Him.

Lord, give us today our daily bread... Your grace is sufficient for me... I trust you'll do what's best for us Lord... I trust fully in you mighty Heavenly Father... Pull us through this crisis Lord... Please do not forsake us your children... I ask all these in the name of our Saviour and for His sake. Amen.