Results out TOMORROW !

Dub dub... dub dub... ( The heart is beating anxiously... )

Results are gonna be out in less than 24 hours. Make that 12. Scaryyyyy...

I've never been this nervous / scared / freaked out awaiting the release of results before. Probably coz this time i know i had did badly. Ahhhh y didn't i study earlier? I thought i could cope with all the stuff i'm involved in, but turns out i was wrong.

Stuff like this always happen, doesn't it? Months before the exams... you'll be thinking... "aiya still got long time to go... lazy to start larr... go enjoy 1st... life's too short yo"

N then... before u know it, BHAM ! Exam's in a month's time.

Cheh. 1 more month is it? Still can relax. Or like in the IPG trend, go sit in the hall for 3 hours' mock just to get back our RM 5 per subject. LOL. Does that sound familiar? *winkx*

N then a bit studying here n there, still go gurney go 'wet'...

Then BHOOM ! 1 MORE WEEK to go.... Walau that time pek chek till wanna lau sai ( errr what's the opposite of constipation? )

Then WHAM ! Tmr's the 1st paper! N you'll be burning the midnite oil flipping through notes that you never touched since the start of your course. Hahaha... This trend is all too familiar d. Then study till probably left 4, 5 hours of sleeeeep. zzzz... Next morn have extra kau coffee to sustain you through the 3 hour paper.

N all the time you'll be regretting for not starting ur revision earlier. Well that's me la... Typical Charm.

Know what, i alwiz did fairly bad in every sitting since CAT ( my foundation course - Certified Accounting Technician ) advance papers. Reason mainly coz i started getting involve in a relationship. N i joined too much activities. From college to church to state events. This is what u call "chiak pa siau eng" !

I had skipped lots of 2.1 (information systems), 2.2 (law) n 2.3 (taxation) classes early last year. N always inevitably late for classes. Coz at nite always cook "phone porridge" till 3, 4 am. Then next morn can't get up. Or certain mornings (esp on fridays) go dim sum with billy. Then lunch also go jalan-jalan cari makan with my gang or even go for a movie & as usual late for afternoon classes as well.

I still remember once i was late for almost an hour for tax. My lecturer Ms Cheah ask me, " Wua... which VIP did u have lunch with? " To which some of my cheeky classmates replied, " Who else? Prince William lah ! "

Ms Cheah just played along. "Prince William you said? What a nice lunch u had ! So shiok ah" "Yeah lor so lucky hor! We all have to stay here for tax with Ms Cheah summore" . Everyone laughed and gave cheeky smiles to me. N then they started writing notes in class (our paper 'msn') discussing about my so-called lunch-date. Adui ! Ms Cheah wanted to korek more but too bad haha. N actually there's more to this scenario but i'll just stop here for personal reasons. Up till today, when Pei Sian sees a postcard of Prince William, she'll bring up the 'date' again.

Next sem, mid of last year. Classes were 2.4 (financial management) , 2.5 (financial reporting) & 2.6 (audit). Hmm Ms Choong, Ms Ang & Ms Parames would know how much i had to skip classes or switch between group A n B to cope with my own activities. Esp the Basketball Clinics (training & coaching) that my church youth had organized together with YWAM (Youth With A Mission) & TAR college & DALAT International School. N lots more other stuff that i'm just "too free" to get myself involved in, like my mom's Thai community events, Spirit of Penang (stg like Amazing Race) , and lots more. End up, the Dec 06 exams i can only take 2 papers coz i know i cant cope with 3 or 4.

I couldnt blame it all on church, college & other activities as i had also spend a whole lot of time erm... with billy... which now kinda seemed like a pretty pointless thing to do, if you'd ask of my opinion. I mean, after everything that i had sacrificed (esp my studies/time/effort/family & friends get-togethers), he just let go of it all... for a pathetic biatch. Our 1 n half year's relationship isn't strong enough to beat meeting a girl in a club. Oh just F it all la.

Ok i shouldn't be vulgar. Sorry... i just cant help being fed-up, now as i look back. My mind was all messed up. Struggling between living alone in London & working with a mean boss & exam stress. I was left tear-stricken close to my June 07 exams. Now i see the consequences of crying like an idiot instead of studying.

Let's just cut the topic. It's making me feel even more worried bout my results. I'm just hoping for the best. Anyway... the anxiety is killing me. Wish everyone the best for their results... And please do not follow my example. I write all these to let you guys learn from my mistake, not repeat them, aight?..

Good nite.